love, percy ,, a pjo au
by snowsbazed
Summary: the whispers about a new student seemed to drown out any other conversation. the whispers were confined to one pathetic friend group with nothing better to talk about. and then the whispers ceased [wheelchair percy/paralyzed percy au] recommend you listen to don't give up on me [andy grammer] while reading this. it'lll hit you hard.
1. before percy,,, prologue

Annabeth couldn't believe the subject of their latest debate. The imbecile level had attained a high.

"I'm telling you! It's two floors and a basement!" Leo argued, gesturing violently with his hands.

"Nuh-uh!" Piper opposed. "I'm sure as hell the basement counts as a floor! That's on real estate websites!"

Grover stood up, sighing.

As fun as this conversation is-"

"It's not."

"Thank you, Annabeth. As I was saying, as fun as it is, I gotta go with Jason to pick up a friend."

"New student?" Hazel questioned.

"Uh, yeah."

"He's hiding something," Will declared, squinting his eyes.

Annabeth scowled, pulling out her notes. She already knew everything about their new classmate. Another mess from Goode High School down in Manhattan. They delivered every single bastard fuck boy the school possessed, and she was sick of it.

Percy Jackson. Her best friend Thalia informed her regarding all his little 'pranks' and difficulties at school. After all, he was related to substantially 50% of her friend group.

"I hear he blew up the gymnasium at Goode."

Annabeth jumped, twisting toward Leo who was centimeters from her ear. She grimaced, shoving him aside.

"How do you even know about him?

"Uh, Jason is my main bro? That's his cousin."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." Jason heaved, shouldering his backpack. "And give Percy a break. You haven't even met him."

Grover nodded, smiling solemnly, "You never know. He might surprise you."

Thalia skipped into their corner of the library, grinning. She held the hand of her longtime boyfriend, Luke Castellan. Boy, was he fucking something.

"Oh, silly little Annie!" Thalia said cheerfully, messing with Annabeth's hair, "Always jumping to conclusions!"

Annabeth made a face at her, sticking her tongue out. There was nothing about Percy Jackson that could surprise her. He was a misogynistic bastard who treated girls like toys. She would know, almost half the school knew about him and they all had similar stories! It couldn't possibly be untrue!


	2. hello percy,,, one

Annabeth was expecting the Antichrist, a vicious, arrogant, stereotypical bad boy with the most obnoxious smile that always ended with a wink. She imagined tattoos, black leather with hanging chains, even a few piercings here and there.

Ten minutes had passed and Grover still had yet to meet them by the dorms just over the hill at the time he promised. She already despised Percy Jackson without meeting him, though a part of her couldn't resist wondering what he would be like. Did he look like Jason or Thalia? Nico? Hazel? Was he more gang member or prison inmate? Did his hair stick up weird or did he have the swoop™?

 _None of the above, dumbass._

"No _fucking_ way," Leo murmured as Jason came into view.

Then Grover, and finally, the infamous Perseus Jackson. He was the exact opposite of what she expected. For starters, he didn't strut in as if he owned the whole place. Hell, he didn't strut at all. Annabeth was beyond shook when she eventually processed what she saw. A goddamn wheelchair.

"Alright, Perce!" Jason encouraged as his cousin struggled up the hill.

Every so often his hands slipped from the wheels, resulting in a string of angry swears.

"I swear-" Percy panted, straining to keep himself from falling backward. "They should make these things jet powered or something."

It only took another minute for Annabeth to realize that he wasn't going to make it up by himself and nobody was gonna bother trying to help. Jason, Thalia, and Grover all stood at the top, glancing at Annabeth expectantly. She sighed, marching down and grabbing the handles of the chair. He glanced up, flashing her a crooked smile,

"I was hoping someone would eventually catch on. I'm no Einstein-"

"Obviously," she muttered.

"Huh. My mom says the same thing."

Annabeth couldn't help the small smile suddenly forming on her face. She never thought the Antichrist could crack something of a joke. She didn't think he _looked_ like the Antichrist, though. He had dark, wild hair. His eyes were a vibrant greenish blue, unlike anything she'd ever seen. When he smiled, two small dimples appeared on each side of his cheek. Annabeth stole a glimpse of his sweatshirt which read **GOODE VARSITY SWIM**.

"You like swimming?" she asked as they nearly reached the height of the hill.

Not that she cared, but the silence was getting much too awkward for her to bear. She was pushing a complete stranger, a stranger known for being a _foul, loathsome evil little cockroach_. Also, Annabeth had to admit to herself that she was curious because Percy Jackson was nothing like she expected him to be.

"Yeah," he replied somewhat wistfully. "'Specially in the ocean."

"That's why your head is so filled with kelp," Thalia said as they reached the top. She seized the handles of the chair from Annabeth, sending her an appreciative grin. Percy mumbled something inaudible, but his body shook with mirth.

Thalia scoffed, whacking the back of his head, "That was _one time!_ And I returned all the pinecones I stole from the Christmas display!"

Jason pushed Thalia over, taking the reigns, "You ready for this, bitchass?"

Percy shrugged, but his grin never wavered, "I told you, no more wheelies."

"Aww," Leo whined, finally recovered from his initial shock. "I was so looking forward to near-death experiences with that thing."

It happened so quick that Annabeth was sure she was the only one who noticed considering how intensely focused she was on Percy. For a split second, his smile wavered, but immediately it returned like nothing happened. That just heightened her interest.

"While I personally would love to see Leo severely injure himself," Frank, Hazel's boyfriend, sighed. "We gotta check Percy into his dorm."

"Do you know your roommates yet?" Hazel asked him.

"Uh, yeah. Two brothers, I forgot their names. I think Taylor and Conrad Still?" he said sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. "And some guy named Will."

"Will Solace?" Nico practically shouted, voice higher than usual.

While the boys got into a discussion about how to maintain the chaotic evil energy when Percy met the Stoll brothers and how to save Will before it was too late, Piper placed a hand on Annabeth's shoulder. Her eyes were sparkling with amusement, but she knew it wasn't about the boy's conversation.

"He's not that bad, pretty funny.." she ventured, her fingers trailing Annabeth's back.

"Fuck off, Pipes. I hate when you do that."

"The trying to get you more friends part or the trailing your back with my fantastic DIY manicure."

"Both," she elbowed Piper in the stomach before walking away.

Her friend laughed, giving her the finger before she headed to her dorm just beyond the hill.

"And in case you were wondering," Annabeth called back. "Your nails look fucking revolting!"

"I know, bitch!"


	3. hello percy,,, two

Travis was 10 seconds away from having a mental breakdown over Will's mental breakdown when there was a knock at their door.

"Will. Seriously, shut the fuck up you're fine."

" _Fine?_ " Will screeched, somewhat manic. "Fine? Travis, we start classes in literally two days. Two days! And I can't fucking find my History of Medicine textbook which also has all my paper notes because I was too lazy to get an actual notebook! I'm screwed!"

While Will moaned over his textbook, Travis and Connor approached the door to meet their new roommate. They heard little to nothing about their mystery roommate other than a couple rumors flying around campus. Apparently, he was batshit crazy. He knew from then that the two, most likely including Connor, would get along just swimmingly.

"He's here!" Connor sang, practically bouncing with excitement.

Besides Travis, the only roommate Connor lived with his entire 5 years at the DSS School was Will. That was enough to drive anyone, and he means anyone, insane. His brother threw open the door and engulfed the first person he saw in a suffocating bear hug,

"Welcome Roomie!"

"Get _off_ me, Stoll!" the unmistakable voice of Nico di Angelo growled. "Wrong guy."

Nico stepped aside to reveal a black-haired guy sitting in a wheelchair. Connor shoved Nico aside, hugging the guy in the chair,

"Welcome real Roomie! Thank you for saving me!"

The guy chuckled, as did Travis. The boy looked about his age, with messy hair and vaguely Mediterranean features. It was obvious that he was related to Nico in some manner, but they clearly weren't brothers.

"This is Percy," Nico introduced. "He's a little broken."

"Ha-ha," Percy muttered sarcastically. "Real funny, Neeks."

Connor was practically bouncing off the walls, inviting Percy in and insisting they invest in a metal curtain separating themselves from Will and Travis' side of the room. Travis had wondered why that year they had been moved into a bigger room. While he originally rejoiced in the fact that his 6 years of complaint letters paid off, it was clear to him then that they just needed to give Percy more room.

Will walked out of the bathroom, distraught, "It's not anywhere! Dr. Asclepius is gonna kill me!"

Nico made a strangled noise and backed out of the dorm room, "Percylookslikeyourallsetgottablastbye."

"You literally managed to scare the scariest kid on Earth just with your face," Connor teased.

Travis turned to Percy who was observing them silently, unquestionably amused. He caught Travis' eye and grinned,

"You guys must have known each other for a while."

He laughed, placing Percy's duffel on his bed,

"Well, Connor and I are brothers."

"Really? I never would have guessed."

Percy would definitely fit in well. He was obviously a laid back guy who was just naturally funny. He would be the perfect asset for prank planning.

"I started here 6 years ago, in fourth grade. Let me tell you: a boarding school for 9-year-olds? I don't know how they managed it. My first year I shared a room with a couple of other guys-"

"-not nearly as fun as us!" Connor inputted, removing Will's missing textbook from below his mattress and onto the desk.

"-but once Will and Connor started, we shared a room and have been ever since."

Percy frowned, "Boarding school in 4th grade? That's crazy."

Travis shrugged in response, "It's no big deal. Plus, you get really close with some people. Hold up- WILL WE FOUND YOUR BOOK YOUR DUMBASS LEFT IT ON THE DESK!"

"YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT" Connor added, cackling.

Will burst out of the closet, tears streaming down his face, "You guys SUCK!"

Percy laughed, high fiving Travis and his brother. Will grabbed the book, and marched back into the closet, kicking all three boys in the shins before slamming the door. Percy smirked,

"Can't feel a thing!"

He was gonna be a good roommate.

That night, Travis had trouble falling asleep. He knew Connor was awake too because when he slept, he breathed much quieter and slower.

"What're you thinking about?" he asked his brother quietly as to not wake Will and Percy.

"I wanna know what happened to him."

Exactly what was on Travis' mind, too. What happened to Percy that left him paralyzed like that? A billion different scenarios flooded his mind, each one more unlikely than the next. But hey, there definitely was a possibility that Percy stepped on a crack and broke the wrong back. It had to be recent because they'd only been moved to a new room in May but knew they were going to have another roommate since March.

"Me too. What do you think happened?"

"It was a cliff diving accident."

That wasn't Connor's voice. It was Percy.

"S-Sorry," Connor stuttered embarrassedly. "We didn't know you were awake."

Travis shook his head, _Idiot_. It was too dark to see anything, but he could vaguely see Percy in his bunk, Will snoring on top.

"In a quarry," he continued. "Thought it would be safe, didn't realize it was so shallow."

"You hit the rocks? Landed on your back?" Connor asked him.

"Hit my head, too. I woke up in the hospital and couldn't move my legs."

Travis admired how easily he talked about the accident. His voice never wavered once, but that too was a little concerning he quickly realized. He couldn't even imagine...

"My dad told me about you," Will said quietly.

 _Oh, great. Now_ he's _awake_.

At that point, Connor just turned on the lamp beside their bunk. All four boys looked at each other in silence. Percy's expression was one of confusion as he craned his neck to try and look up at Will who was hanging off the side.

"Let me explain-"

And he did. Turned out that Will's dad was Percy's doctor, and he really watered down the story. Brain and spinal cord injuries, collapsed lung, the list went on and on. In short, he was one of the worst patients his dad had in years. He almost died.

"Shit, man," Connor said in a tone barely above a whisper. "That was pretty badass!"

And the four roommates spent the rest of the night talking about how fucking cool it was that Percy Jackson nearly killed himself by jumping off a cliff into a quarry.


	4. hello percy,,, three

"We want to do something for Percy's birthday," Jason and Leo declared together. "That is why we have invited all of you today to join us."

"Oh, thank god," Piper breathed. "I thought this was a declaration of your undying love for one another or something."

Annabeth snorted, "Please. Jason is the straightest white boy I've ever met."

"Anyways!" Jason shouted, his cheeks bright red.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Jay Jay," Will teased. "Not all of us can control our het desires."

"Real funny," he muttered.

Annabeth smiled. She loved her friends. Although they were all batshit crazy, she couldn't imagine all her years at DSS without them. They kept her sane during the worst years of her life, and she could never repay them for that. They sat in their normal spot, the corner of the school library with the three worn out couches and wooden table with uneven legs. Everyone else at school knew it was their spot. Nobody touched it or moved the books, clothes, shoes, you name it, that was left over.

"As I was saying," Jason said pointedly toward Annabeth and Piper. "Birthday. He's never had a birthday party before because nobody throws him one."

"So, naturally, we wanna throw him one. With the squad!" Leo finished, throwing his hands up excitedly.

"That sounds-"

"Horrible!" Annabeth exclaimed.

"Hella fun!" Piper shouted.

"What do you have against Percy anyways, Annie?" Thalia asked her, cuddling with Luke.

 _Always with Luke_.

"First: don't call me that. Second: he's hurt a lot of people. I doubt he's changed."

"He was going through a rough time, Annabeth. A _lot_ has changed," Grover told her gently.

"That's no excuse for what he did to Reyna," she said stubbornly, crossing her arms.

Nico raised his hand, "Uh- who is Reyna and what exactly did Percy _do?_ "

"I, personally, would also like to know. So spill," Frank said while staring at her intently.

At the mention of Reyna, Annabeth noticed Jason's face turning a deep red. He was blushing, but why? Did he _know_ Reyna, and if so why wasn't he saying anything? He kept glancing over at Piper nervously which only heightened her curiosity. Why Piper? But that wasn't the point. Percy Jackson had done Rey dirty and Annabeth wouldn't forgive him, even if he _wasn't_ a misogynistic fuckboy anymore. Reyna surely wasn't the only one.

Based on the look on Grover's face, she wasn't supposed to tell. She sighed,

"Confidential. As much as I want to expose him, it isn't my story."

Frank frowned, "I'll text you later. I can break you."

She rolled her eyes, gesturing for Jason and Leo to continue sharing their idea. It was a lot of _he's never had a birthday party!_ and _it's his sixteenth!_ kind of things that incited pity. Unfortunately for Annabeth, it worked. She begrudgingly agreed to be involved in throwing a small party for the new kinda-Antichrist.

"Oh, thank god that worked," Leo muttered. "Anyway! His birthday is the 18th which is… oh shit, it's tomorrow. So we can throw the 'party' on the 19th."

Hazel raised her hand, her expression somewhat smug, "Isn't the 19th the first day of school, genius?"

"Perfect timing for a party! Yay, day one of a year of suffering and emotional meltdowns! Let's go sophomore year!"

Will raised his hand, "And freshman!"

Leo waved his hand distractedly, "You guys are irrelevant."

"So what should we do?" The Stoll brothers asked from behind her.

Annabeth jumped, shooting a glare at the boys. They had been so uncharacteristically quiet she hadn't even realized they were in the library, let alone breathing down her back. Did it have to do with Percy being their roommate? Or wait… She felt her back pocket and groaned,

"Give me back my wallet, shitheads."

The brothers scowled, handing her back her wallet, her hairband, phone, and a condom.

"Ooh!" Connor said excitedly. "Is Annie getting laid tonight?"

"No," she replied unbothered. "Piper and I are gonna fill it with water and drop it on Will's head in a bathtub while listening to Shawn Mendes and One Direction."

Connor turned to Will who was picking at his nails, horrified.

"Why would you _agree_ to that?" he practically screamed at his roommate.

Will shrugged, "We're all single, man. If it's not going in us it might as well go on us."

Piper snorted, throwing an arm around Connor.

"It's only gross if you get the lube in your hair, bud."

He pushed her off, whining, "I wanna come."

Will smirked, "Sorry, Con. This is a gays only event."

"Piper and Annabeth are straight!"

Annabeth grinned, scooting closer to Piper and wrapping her arms around her neck. Piper smiled slyly and joined in on the act, grabbing Annabeth's waist. She leaned in for a kiss which Piper returned. It was all worth it in the end.

"What the actual fuck?"

"Yes, ladies!"

"Oh, jesus…"

"Wait- let me grab my camera!"

"Leo, you're fucking disgusting."

"I knew it!"

They pulled away and Piper, still on her lap, goggled at Thalia who was laughing madly.

"What do you mean you _knew?_ "

"You're def lesbo material, girlie."

Annabeth chuckled, shoving Piper off which caused her to tumble back onto the floor. She gave everyone the finger, blowing her messy hair out from her eyes. Jason stood, lifting his backpack.

"So we just meet in me, Nico, and Leo's room, 'kay? Will, you just bring Percy at 5 and Connor? Don't fuck it up and tell him."

"I will not! I won't even tell him who's gonna be there- _ohhh_."

Hazel whacked him on the head, "Don't do something stupid, shithead."

"Bitchass!"

"Tit Wad!"

"Both of you shut up!" Travis shouted, grabbing Connor by the ear and dragging him out of the library. Annabeth followed them out, apologizing to others who were trying to get work done and the poor librarian who'd given up all hope. Will ran up behind her, holding up his phone which already had their **Summer is Over LMAOOOOOO KILL ME** playlist pulled up on Spotify.

"You ready, Lesbos?"

"Let's do this, gaybie."


	5. hello percy,,, four

That day was the worst fucking day of Percy's life. It was funny because no matter how fucking hard he tried he would never forget it. His mom warned him: _Perseus Jackson don't you dare jump off that goddamn cliff! Remember what happened to that boy in New Jersey?_ Of course, being the little shit that he was, Percy ignored the warnings. He packed up his swimsuit, picked up his ex, Rachel, and they made their way to the quarry.

"You know- we could always get back together?"

She laughed, elbowing him, "Keep dreaming, Perce. We're better just as friends."

"What about friends with benefits?" he suggested with a cheeky grin.

Rachel shook her head, a smile playing on her face. She was gorgeous, the way her freckles stood out in the sunlight, her red frizz practically glowing. Percy couldn't believe that he'd fucked up so badly that they weren't dating anymore. He'd been so happy…

"You sure we won't get caught?" she asked nervously, pulling at her white bandana.

He'd made the genius decision of not only going, illegally, to cliff jump at a quarry but also driving there underage. He would get his license in August, but he wasn't feeling taking a cab. Did cabs even drive out there? Percy didn't know, and, quite honestly, didn't care. He just wanted the time of his life before his mom sent him to that private school in Long Island. They pulled up to a trail in the forest. Ahead of them lay a winding dirt path that ultimately ended at the cliffside. They would meet Percy's cousins, Jason and Thalia, at the pit. He shouldered the cooler bag and turned to Rachel who was stripping down to her suit.

"Looking sexy, Miss Thing."

She stuck her tongue out, giggling, "Anything for you, baby. Let's go before you lose yourself in my tits."

He shouldered her, nearly knocking her over. Rachel gasped, grabbing a rock from the ground. Percy took that as a cue to make a run for it. He sprinted past what felt like a million trees all while Rachel was spewing out threats he was sure she would carry out. Eventually, he reached the clearing where Jason, Thalia, and her boyfriend Luke were waiting. Percy tossed the bag toward Thalia with a quick,

"Scarywhitegirlgottarun!"

He hid behind a boulder right when Rachel emerged from the bushes, a playful yet determined expression on her face.

"Percy, I swear- I will rip off your head and deport it back to fucking Morocco or wherever your Meditteranean ass is from!"

"I think it's Malta," Jason piped up, opening the bag.

"Twisted tea?" Thalia groaned. "Really Percy? What are you, six?"

"It's for the sake of the VSCO," Luke teased, opening a raspberry one.

Jason swat is out of his hand, "Not until after the jumping; we aren't trying to fucking die!"

"But-"

"No buts you shitheads. Percy, get out from behind the fucking rock and let's do this."

Rachel turned swiftly to the rock, prompting him to jump out with both hands up as a sign of peace.

"Truce!" he shouted, raising an eyebrow as if asking a question.

She studied him for a good ten seconds before sighing in defeat,

" _Fine_. Let's go, Kelp Head. We haven't got all fucking day."

He grinned, snatching the camera from Luke's backpack.

"I swear to god, Percy. You get to record _one_ jump. I don't have enough storage."

Percy cupped a hand to his ear, "Sorry? I didn't hear you. Three videos, was it?"

The cliff loomed below them, a man-made staircase carved into the side. The water gleamed a turquoise blue, the clear sky reflecting off the surface. He kept his eye out for rocks. There was a pile to the right of him, but other than that the water looked deep enough to jump. The ledge was much higher than the other ones he and Jason had gone to.

"Fuck off, Jackson! One video!"

Jason ran up behind him, chuckling, "He _will_ kill you, dude."

"Nah, he's all talk. He'll just tell my mom or something."

"He's basically second-hand murdering you."

Percy frowned, "Well, at least I got to do this first. After you, sunshine."

Jason scowled at the nickname, "Don't call me that. You ready?"

He held up the camera with a grin and a thumbs up. Jason removed his shirt, tossing it on the ground behind him. _Tan for a white boy_ , Percy thought. _How are we even related?_ Jason gave him one last smirk then jumped. He had to admit it _was_ pretty wicked. His cousin showed off with a few flips and what looked like finger guns before landing in the water with barely a splash.

"You got the video?" he yelled up, barely audible.

"Nope!" Percy lied, snickering.

Luke, Thalia, and Rachel came up behind him with disapproving looks.

"You're a real asshole," Thalia sniggered, grabbing the camera from him. "You next, Barnacle Brain."

"You suck at nicknames, you know," he told her, taking off his shirt.

Thalia faced the camera toward him, "You think you can come up with a better one?"

Percy smirked at her right before jumping, "Anytime, Pinecone Face."

"IT WAS ONE TIME, ASSHAT!" she screamed, but he was long gone.

One of the main reasons he loved cliff jumping was the feeling of being weightless. Despite his horrible fear of planes, he didn't mind the massive dive. Knowing the water was beneath him was comforting, giving him the strength to leap. After a few times, he didn't even think twice about it.

"Woohoo!" he screeched, throwing his arms up and laughing.

The water was growing closer. A sense of dread washed over him, but Percy brushed it off as nerves. The wind blew through his hair, sun beating down on him. It was summer. Things were fun. Everything was perfect.

Then it was not. Something was wrong. That sense of dread turned into red hot pain. Rocks. Why were their rocks? He hadn't seen- He did see rocks. As he jumped, instead of aiming for the left he accidentally aimed for the right, straight into a pile of boulders. Percy was blacking out, slipping in and out of consciousness. Around him, the water turned a dark maroon shade. He tried to get up but couldn't move. Was he stuck?

"Percy!" Jason called, though his voice sounded far away.

He wasn't stuck. Maybe he was dying?

"Guys, get down here!"

Thalia was afraid of heights; she didn't like the water very much either. She only came for Luke and the drinks. She would go down the stairs, probably. It was funny that she didn't like heights, her dad was a pilot. Percy didn't dare tease her about it, though. She'd rip off his limbs and feed it to the wolves. His vision went dark again, this was his end. He should've listened to his mom, told her he loved her. Returned the kiss and the hug.

 _Splash! Splash! Splash!_ Huh, maybe Thalia did jump down with them. His eyes cleared again, but he still couldn't move. More red, he was bleeding out- no, it was Rachel's hair. Percy tried to raise his arm to push it out of his face but it didn't work. She gently lifted his head- Wait. Why didn't his arm work? He tried the other one, putting the small amount of effort he had left in him to try and move it but to no avail. Maybe not-working limbs were a side-effect of dying. He couldn't imagine living with not-working limbs

Finally, his head was above water. He didn't realize that he wasn't breathing. Thankfully, being on the swim team helped build up lung capacity. The swim team, would they miss him? He was pretty good, his coach called him the best freshman they ever had, best on the team. Percy liked swimming.

"Okay, anyone got their phones on them?"

"Of course not, Luke!" Thalia screamed, somewhat manic. "Why would we jump down with our phones!"

Percy's eyes began to close again. He fought to stay conscious, but it was too much. Everything going on around him was hazy, he just feared that if he complied with what his body wanted he'd never wake up again. He wasn't ready to die.

"Don't even start you two," Jason warned.

"He's right," Rachel agreed. "We got to get him to a hospital, so our only option is to carry him up. The stairs are over there."

From the time it took to get him up the cliffside and back to Luke's car, Percy must've blacked out over fifteen times. He couldn't form coherent thoughts, many of them random and irrelevant. He knew he was bleeding, and it had to have been pretty bad considering Jason was covered in red. His chest ached, and his head pounded. It was as if someone had stabbed him at the base of his skull. Percy only caught bits of conversation between his friends, all of them encouraging him and one another. He was beyond thankful.

"Jason, start the car," Thalia ordered frantically, jumping in the front seat.

Percy didn't remember being brought in the car. His head was on Rachel's lap, wrapped in a towel. She was crying, pushing his hair out of his face.

"You're going to be fine," she whispered. "Everything is alright."

He couldn't speak. The last thing he remembered was Jason, way too young to drive, pulling out of the makeshift parking spot Luke had made for himself, and speeding down the trail. Then, Percy woke up in the hospital. He didn't die, but he sure as hell felt like it.

None of his limbs would respond, they just wouldn't _move_. It was like Percy was telling a strand of hair to get out from his eyes. He began to panic, breaths coming in faster than normal. He'd yet to look anywhere but the ceiling, too afraid of what lay before him. Were his arms and legs even _there?_ What happened when he hit those rocks? Maybe he _was_ dead. Did heaven look like a hospital room in the Bible?

 _"Oh-_ Percy!" someone exclaimed, throwing their arms around him.

He inhaled the scent of chocolate cookies and flowers, a weird but soothing combination. He immediately knew it was his mom. God, he'd been so horrible. Not listening to her warnings, refusing to kiss her goodbye, worrying her like that. How long was he even out? A terrifying thought struck him: had it been _years?_ Was he twenty? Percy didn't _feel_ twenty. Well, actually, he didn't feel anything at all. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He tried again, forming his mouth to say words but it was like his vocal cords refused to listen to his brain.

"Baby, thank goodness you're okay! I was worried sick!"

The guilt hit him like a truck. She should've been mad at him for disobeying her and jumping and taking the car and drinking. Percy didn't deserve her love.

"Everyone else is outside, okay? You're okay."

Percy knew he wasn't okay. Something was wrong with him. His mind was buzzing, rushing with a million thoughts per hour. It was as if his body was disconnected from his brain like it suddenly just became dead weight from below his neck. Slowly, he forced his eyes to look down past the ceiling. Percy almost puked. It took a while for him to comprehend everything he saw: wires, so many wires. Part of his vision was obstructed by something around his neck. Maybe death would've been better.

Percy wanted to talk; he wanted to tell his mom he loved her. He wanted to apologize for being an asshole, thank his friends for saving his life. Ask what was wrong with him, yell out in frustration. There was so much he wanted to do but so little he could. Instead, he cried. His mom wiped the tears from his face, but they kept flowing. He'd ruined his life at just fifteen. There was so much he wanted to do. _Better off dead, Perce_.

"I love you," his mom whispered over and over again. "I love you so much, everything is okay. You're here! You're alive and healthy and awake!"

I love you too! he wanted to scream. She just held him in her arms for a while, sitting on the edge of the bed. At the time, all his thoughts were a jumbled mess. Only later did he realize how strong his mom being so close made him. Everything was crashing down around him, but she was there. And by some miracle, she wasn't pissed.

"-paralyzed…"

The doctor kept talking but Percy wasn't listening. His vision tunneled, focusing on his legs. _Paralyzed_. He should have thought about walking, how it would affect his social life, how he would get through life. The only thing that he cared about at that exact moment was swimming. Percy Jackson, state champion, number 18th in the country, would never swim again. The only thing he was good at. It took a moment before everything else hit him. No more cliff jumping with Jason, random car trips with Rachel, snowboarding with Thalia. _Paralyzed_.

Percy's mom didn't cry; she wouldn't dare in front of him. She just nodded, asked what would happen next. She was so calm; he was not. If he could move they best bet he would be throwing the world's biggest teenage tantrum. But he couldn't move. Those stupid legs that kicked him through the water, carried him when he walked, would never fucking move again.

He'd never jump off another cliff in his life.

Now, on his birthday, nearly four months after the accident, the feelings of helplessness rushed over him. He just wanted to cry. Every year, Percy and his dad went to the beach at Montauk. It started as a tradition when his mom couldn't take him like they usually did at the end of the school year in 3rd grade. To make up for it, his birth dad decided to surprise him with a trip on his birthday. They'd been going ever since.

He was 16. It was supposed to be the best trip yet. They would bring Jason and Thalia and Hazel and Nico. Instead, he sat alone in his dorm waiting for his dad to pick him up.

 **it's gonna be the best one yet,** i **swear - dad 🌊👨 🇲🇹🖕**

 **ok dad - the son 🐢🖕 🐠**

 **you don't believe me + jase is on his way - dad 🌊👨 🇲🇹🖕**

 **ok dad- the son 🐢🖕 🐠**

 **say something - dad 🌊👨 🇲🇹🖕**

 **ok dad - the son 🐢🖕 🐠**

 **other than that perce - dad 🌊👨 🇲🇹🖕**

 **ok parental - the son 🐢🖕 🐠**

 **you know what i'm gonna stop answering now be there in 10 - dad 🌊👨 🇲🇹🖕**

 **ok dad - the son 🐢🖕 🐠**

Percy sighed, putting down his phone. The only other person in the room was Will who was combing something greasy out of his messy hair in the bathroom. It looked vaguely like…

"Is that lube?" he asked incredulously.

Will smirked, "Fun times with Annabeth and Piper. Happy birthday, by the way."

"Thanks. And Piper, she with Jason?"

"I don't know, you into her?" Will said, pulling back his hair into a bun.

Percy shrugged, "Not really. Just wanted to know if he was over his ex."

That interested Will. He bounded out of the bathroom, jumping onto Percy's bed with a sneaky grin on his face,

"Spill, Water Boy."

"Her name was Reyna-"

"Reyna?" he screamed. "You didn't happen to… ya know…"

 _Uh oh_ , Percy thought. _Someone told_. He racked his brain for people at his new school that new Reyna besides his family. He trusted that they wouldn't tell. Who had Will been with the night before- Annabeth? She sounded familiar.

"Doesn't matter," Percy said quickly. "It's all in the past."

Thankfully, he got a text from his dad saying that he was outside. As if on cue, Jason walked into their room, backpack slung over his shoulder.

"Should I have knocked?"

"Even if I say yes, you won't," Will sighed, getting up from Percy's bed.

"That, sir," Jason said, pointing at Will. "Is very true."

His cousin made his way to the bed, pushing Percy's chair beside it. Jason assisted him in, only increasing the feeling of helplessness. His dad promised the best trip ever, but that was bullshit. They couldn't go to Montauk and Percy couldn't swim. _At least you'll be with your family_ , he chided himself. _Don't be an ungrateful bitch._

"Are you gonna be a lazy piece of shit today or are you gonna push yourself?"

Percy grinned, "I'm 16 now, a man! But I am feeling pretty laz-"

"I'm not pushing you."

He pouted, "Fine. Let's roll, Sparky."

Jason kicked his chair at the nickname, scowling, "You aren't allowed to tell anyone about that."

Percy turned to Will before leaving, the younger boy grinning evilly. He was sure that by the end of the day, everyone would be calling Jason by his nickname.


	6. hello percy,,, five

**short chapter aka the shitshow**

Jason loved Percy, but god his cousin was so fucking annoying. By the time they came back from Long Island Sound, where his uncle had taken them for Percy's birthday, everyone in the whole school was texting him and calling him Sparky. Will had told all of their friends which included Piper, who, naturally, told everyone she knew. Which was everyone.

"Hey, at least I didn't tell everyone _how_ you got the nickname!"

They sat in Leo's dorm, preparing for Percy's "party." Everyone made the decision to turn into a Yay Percy/Fuck School venting session, per Annabeth's suggestion. She was having a shit day and insisted on it. Frank voted on her behalf, mostly because he wanted to get the story of Percy and Reyna from last year. Reyna... _No, you are not getting into that_ , Jason scolded himself, focusing his attention back on Piper.

He groaned, "How do you know the story!"

She glanced at Thalia, who was pretending to read her chemistry textbook. She wasn't even taking chemistry. Jason removed his shoe and threw it at her head.

"What was that for!"

"Why would you tell her, _Piper_ , of all people?"

She threw the shoe back, but he caught it, "Because it was _funny_."

"Pinecone story funny?"

Her expression went from amused to murderous in a matter of milliseconds. Thalia placed the book down on the bed, deadly calm. He should have been afraid, but she wouldn't kill him. Not in front of all those witnesses.

"Jason fucking Grace, don't you dare. We don't speak of it."

"Speak of what?" Leo asked, spreading out the assortment of Hi-C and probably something with weed in it.

His friends were emotional potheads.

"In eighth grade-"

"No!" Thalia screeched, grabbing Jason by his shirt and putting her hand over his mouth.

He licked it, but she didn't budge. Her grip was like iron. Jason prayed that his jaw wasn't broken because that shit HURTED.

"Mrph!" he complained, trying to kick her.

"Swear you won't tell!"

"This is actually really fun to watch," Hazel mused.

"It really is," Piper and Leo agreed, pulling the chair from Nico's desk and setting it in front of the two fighting siblings.

"Get _off!_ " he tried to scream, but it sounded more like "Hmph _Grmph_!"

"I said _swear_ , Jason! I'm not fucking kidding!"

Frank leaned against Nico's chair which was occupied by Piper and Leo. He pulled out a bag of chips from underneath Leo's bed, watching intently.

"Well, now I wanna know."

"Not gonna happen, _Koi Boy!_ "

"Don't call me that, _Pinecone Face_. I'll break Annabeth, and I'll break you too."

Nicknames upon nicknames. Jason didn't know the history of _Koi Boy_ , but the story of _Pinecone Face_ was begging to be told. He was just doing his God-ordained duty to the people. Frank didn't look scary, but he was exceptionally skilled in getting people to spill. No matter what, the story was going to come out. Thalia was just delaying the inevitable.

"If you can't get Annabeth to tell how can you possibly get me!"

Annabeth scoffed, grabbing a juice box, "If you pay Thalia, she'll tell you anything."

"Fifty!" Nico offered, grabbing for Leo's wallet.

"I want payment in Chick Fil A for a year."

Nico stared accusingly at Annabeth who shrugged, "I didn't say what _kind_ of pay."

"Chick Fil A donates money to anti-LGBT organizations, we don't stan," Will mumbled from the doorway.

"Dude!" Leo screamed. "You're supposed to be with Percy!"

Will shrugged, "I got bored. Connor is bringing him."

Jason threw his hands up in the air, exasperated, "This is a disaster."

"Aw, _Sparky_ ," Piper cooed, wrapping her arms around him. "What did you expect. A giant group of imbeciles throwing a party for an even bigger imbecile, or so I've heard. This is just natural."

"How long did it take you to come up with that one?" Annabeth asked.

"Ten minutes," she said proudly. "I was hoping someone would say something along those lines."

Jason rolled his eyes, pushing Piper off of him and onto the ground. She huffed, giving him the finger which prompted him to stick out his tongue.

"Real mature," Nico muttered.

"Ah, but you love us, Neeks!" Will said cheerfully, ruffling his hair.

His cousin turned a bright red shade. Jason laughed, mouthing,

" _Smooth_."

"Shut up," Nico mouthed back, elbowing Will in the gut.

"Um, _ow!_ "

"Keep talking, sunshine. I could do this all day."

"Wrong universe," Will mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Percy's coming!" Leo hissed, flipping the light switch.

* * *

"What's with him?" Jason whispered, nudging Connor.

"He's kind of in a bad mood."

"But _why_ , Stoll?"

"He, uh, pissed himself last night. Embarrassed."

It was clear to everyone Percy wasn't as into the party as they'd hoped. He didn't engage in any crackhead-esque conversations, his specialty, and kept to himself in the corner. To Jason's surprise, the first person to go over to him was Annabeth. After a few minutes, they were all sitting in a circle on the floor, Percy against the bedpost, laughing their asses off.

"So Percy," Leo began, grabbing for another juice box. "Since I need to about now, how do you pee?"

Jason glanced cautiously at Percy, who no doubt was sensitive to the subject after what happened the night before. At first, his cousin shied away from the question, trying to change the topic of conversation to the chips underneath the bed. But after a round of Leo's brownies, he was more willing.

"With help, I guess."

"What, like someone drags you into the bathroom or-"

"No," Percy interrupted, laughing. "This is so awkward."

Hazel smiled, "We all know almost everything about each other, Percy. Can't be more awkward than when Travis caught two teachers hooking up in the staff bathroom in seventh grade and gave us the full, explicit rundown. It's nothing worse than we've heard before."

"Inspiring, Hazel. Honestly," Piper teased. "But she's right, Percy. Try us."

"A catheter, but sometimes I think I don't need it and uh- doesn't really work out."

"Don't you need like a caretaker or someone to change it every few hours?" Annabeth asked him, one of the few times she acknowledged his existence.

Percy shifted his gaze to Will, who just shrugged,

"Dad taught me how. And, if I'm gonna be honest, it's more of a benefit for me than it is for him. Really, the pleasure is all mine."

This prompted a round of shouts, most of them along the lines of "Will, shut the fuck up."

Percy just blushed, stuffing two brownies into his mouth at once.

It was gonna be a long night.


	7. hello percy,,, six

Annabeth didn't know whether it was the brownies or pure curiosity that prompted her to offer to take Percy back to his room. He deserved a tour of the campus and, quite frankly, she deserved answers. Again, be it brownies or curiosity, but her main thought was that he'd be more inclined to answer her questions with the drug in his system. Maybe even explain why he did what he did to Reyna, not that it took any explanation to change her opinion of him.

"You know," Percy began, voice slurring slightly. "You're the last person I expected to offer to help me back."

"Well, with you downing half the pan and your idiot roommates the other, I was concerned you'd never make it back."

"Not because you wanna ask me anything, though," he said smugly.

Annabeth could hear the smirk in his tone and she frowned, "I could let go of this chair right now and you'd roll right into the pond. Don't test me."

"That would be my first swim since the accident. I'm thinking it'd be a less than favorable experience."

"Did you not go swimming yesterday?" she asked, genuinely interested.

"If you count me sitting at the edge after having been dragged there in front of a crowd of people giving nothing but pitiful looks for the pathetic cripple then yeah, I did," Percy answered bitterly.

She didn't push any further. They were quiet for a while. Annabeth took the long way, a bumpy sidewalk that led around the campus and the surrounding neighborhood. It would be a while before they reached the dorms, let alone Percy's room. He'd have plenty of time to cool down.

"I didn't mean to snap at you," he said eventually, trying to look up at her. "I appreciate you taking me back."

"Yeah, well. It's nothing. And if I'm gonna be honest, I do have some questions."

"Not gonna lie, I probably don't have many answers. I'm kinda dumb."

Annabeth laughed, a real laugh. For a second she forgot about Reyna and thought about how Percy really wasn't that bad. How he said things that would make her cringe if it came from anyone else, but coming from him were actually funny. How he kept things real. How he was absolutely rotten for what he did to her friend, _god_. Annabeth couldn't put it aside. But she had to if she wanted answers.

"My first one, just based off of the conversation in Leo's room, shouldn't you have a caretaker?"

She heard Percy sigh, "Didn't want one."

"I don't think it works like that," she laughed, getting closer to the edge of the pond where it was more visible.

It seemed to calm him down.

"I mean, there's Will. He's like a baby scholar- are scholars doctors?"

Annabeth shook her head, ignoring his question, "Emphasis on _baby_. He's barely fifteen and has absolutely no filter- the kid just told a group of people he loved looking at your dick."

"He knows more than half the doctors I've been to, the only one knowing more being his dad. And again, don't want a caretaker."

Annabeth wanted to ask why, but she already knew. Percy was embarrassed. He'd been a high profile athlete, he had dreams of becoming a professional. He had his future planned out, he was capable, now he had nothing. She couldn't even imagine- no, she could.

"When I was little I wanted to be a model-"

Percy laughed, but she wasn't mad.

"I know it's stupid."

"I don't think it's stupid, you'd be a good model. Just don't seem like the kind of person who'd wanna be one."

"Well, I did, but I couldn't."

"Why?" he asked, attempting to try and face her.

She pulled his chair over by a bench facing the pond.

"You wanna sit on the bench with me?"

Percy smiled sheepishly and nodded. Annabeth helped him up, making sure not to "drag" him, something she too felt was too belittling. One they were sitting, the conversation continued.

"I have this thing, it's called rosacea. When I get stressed or irritated, it flares up and my cheeks get all red and these bumps show up. Makeup just makes it worse. Not a lot of people want models who can't wear makeup- the industry just isn't there yet."

"I'm sorry," he said softly, patting her hand.

It was awkward but comforting. She liked talking to him and did, for a moment, forget about Reyna. Except for this time when she remembered, she wasn't angry. Annabeth would ask him later, she didn't want to ruin where they were. Percy wasn't too bad. It wasn't the brownies talking.

"You probably already know, but I wanted to be a swimmer."

She knew.

"It was the only thing I had going for me. I kept my grades up, to an extent, to stay on the team but I'm not smart like that. And sitting still like this, I can't do it. I can't imagine a life where I'm okay with this. I have a bag of piss attached to my thigh, I've gained twenty pounds, there are times my legs are in so much pain and it makes so sense because I shouldn't feel anything but holy fuck they hurt so bad and there is _nothing_ I can do about it. There is nothing I can do about anything anymore."

Annabeth let him talk. For him, it _was_ the brownies talking, but it was all real. She felt bad, not because of what he was saying, but why he was saying it. Percy obviously didn't feel like he could talk to anyone, and with the drug and her being an attentive listener, he decided she was good enough. He dumped all his problems on her from not being confident with his weight gain to how he couldn't imagine growing up and living immobilized.

It was scary. Annabeth heard this talk before. From Luke, when she was in 7th grade, right before he almost killed himself. Percy wasn't just sad, he was broken. Still, he told her things he probably hadn't told anyone before, and she still didn't know _how_ he got paralyzed.

"If you don't mind me asking, what happened?"

By that point, Percy was a wreck. He had tears streaming down his face and his nose was running like crazy. Attempts to shield his face from Annabeth's view were unsuccessful. He had nothing to lose.

"I went cliff jumping. Hit a rock, almost severed my spinal cord which means dead. Kinda wish it went that route, I'd be better off, honestly."

"Why are you telling me these things?"

"You asked...?"

"No, the other things," Annabeth said in a softer tone. "You're opening up to me when I've been nothing but horrible to you."

"I- I don't know."

The brownies. The brownies and he was just like a broken dam.

"Why'd you do what you did to Reyna?"

For the first time that night he was taken aback. Percy didn't know she knew by his reaction. More tears. Annabeth tried, she tried to hard to be angry at him. But she was sitting next to him in front of a beautiful pond with the moon making everything glow and it was so peaceful. She couldn't be angry.

"I wanna say I didn't mean to, I really do. But I hurt her, and I knew what I was doing when I did. And I tried to apologize, but she wouldn't hear it. Which I deserve."

Annabeth was surprised. He didn't try and defend himself but instead admitted what he did was horrible. Any ill will she held for him was gone and replaced with respect.

"You know Percy Jackson, you aren't half bad."

He smiled, "Debateable. But thanks, Annabeth. You aren't as scary as I thought."

She returned the smile, "You can talk to me any time. I'm only an asshole to people I don't like."

Hopefully, it wasn't just the brownies.


	8. hello percy,,, seven

Percy had way too many of Leo's brownies. But maybe it was a good thing because the next morning when he woke up, it felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. It was fuzzy, but he vaguely remembered breaking down to none other than Annabeth Chase, someone he barely knew. Now _she_ knew _him_ better than anyone. All he knew about her was that she wanted to be a model, but that might've just been the weed talking. No that's not all, he knew Annabeth was friends with _Reyna_. Of all his regrets, from jumping off that cliff to showing up to Comic-Con in fifth grade dressed as Carol Danvers, what he did to Reyna was up there.

It was the beginning of freshman year. He was already pretty popular, being just fifteen and not only the best swimmer in the school, but one of the best in the nation. Then, he hooked up with the most popular girl in the grade above him, his first time. Her name was Drew Tanaka, and she thrived off of America's Next Top Model reruns and unnecessary drama. Like Percy, that particular period of time was her golden age. She was practically worshiped like a baby goddess, and it got to her head. The school was fresh out of tea and Drew was ready to spill it. But she needed to make it first.

So, naturally, she used Percy. Now, he was enjoying being popular. It meant people liked him, and since he wasn't into being an asshat, it was genuine. Suddenly people cared about him, which meant he had to start acting like a popular kid. He posted more on Instagram, deleted old pictures, including the Carol Danvers costume, and dressed in things other than basketball shorts and Minnows Swim Team t-shirts from three years ago. People were into him, both romantically and platonically. Everyone wanted to be his friend. The New and Improved Percy was living his best life, but only one person saw through it. And it was his best friend, Reyna.

Despite being the scariest person he knew, she was also his only close friend before getting so popular. And the girl Jason was in love with. She kept him sane, but soon, everything was getting to his head. So one night with Drew and her friends, they devised a plan. To get the drama started again. And it included Reyna.

"She's a lesbian so it might not even work," Drew's friend, Aaliyah, said boredly.

"Uh, she's not a lesbian," Percy piped up, taking another hit from Drew's dab pen.

Things were starting to get fuzzy, and somehow he agreed to the plan in front of some of the most popular kids in the sophomore and junior class. In the past, Reyna had shown interest in Percy, but he gently turned her down. Drew's friends wanted him to take her to a party, get her in bed, then leave without a word. And to top it all off, kiss Drew in front of her right after. If he said no, it would all be over. All the popularity, friends, fun. If he said yes, he'd lose his best friend. _There are other friends_. He valued popularity over friendship- he'd reached his asshat peak.

"Okay, but how is this supposed to be funny?"

"Why is Keeping Up with the Kardashians interesting? Drama is good, baby," Aaliyah said, patting his cheek absentmindedly.

Percy pushed it away, frowning, "So you think people talking about it is interesting?"

"Oh, she'll get over it. It'll just inspire more people to do the same, and we'll finally have something fun to talk about," Drew told him, rubbing her thumb over his hand.

She was probably expecting him to take her hand, but he just pulled away. What he was about to do was revolting and would change his image forever. He wouldn't be the nice pretty boy swimmer everyone loved, but the one night stand pretty boy everyone either was afraid of, swooned over, or hated. Who Reyna hated. Who Jason, his cousin, his _brother_ , would hate. But the popular kids wouldn't. That's all that mattered.

So the next weekend, Drew had her party. It took a while, but Reyna finally agreed to join him.

"Come on, it'll be fun! We don't even have to hang with them!"

She hesitated, "They aren't really people I'd like to be seen with. They are stuck in the 90s. Like newsflash headasses: being assholes isn't cool anymore."

Percy laughed, grabbing her hand, "It'll be fine. Plus, Drew's house is massive. We don't have to hang out with anyone."

Reyna initially tensed, but then her hand relaxed, and she smiled, "Fine. But if any of those prostitoddlers talk to me, I'm allowed one hit."

"Like hit a blunt or-"

"My god, Percy, no. I mean like a punch. They are really getting to you."

She had no idea.

It couldn't have possibly gone worse. At the last minute, the very last minute, after both of them were undressed in Drew's bed, Percy confessed. Naturally, Reyna blew up.

"Are you fucking _serious_ , Percy? _God!_ I should've known, all that _shit_ was getting to your head!" she fumed, practically jumping away from him.

"I'm sorry! I just-"

"I don't even wanna hear it! Do you know what kind of _evil_ you have to have inside of you to even agree to this?"

"This is probably a bad time, but Drew is expecting me to-"

"Yes, it's a bad time!" she screamed, punching him in the gut. "Get out!"

He doubled over, wishing he couldn't feel it. Oh, how the tables have turned. Percy didn't bother saying anymore. But the second he opened the door, his friends Damian and Paolo ran in and swiped clothes and bra and throwing them out the window, leaving her topless and in nothing but her underwear. She didn't break down, though. Reyna kicked Percy's feet from under him, and he crashed hard onto the carpeted floor. Then, stone-faced, she walked down the stairs and out the door.

Drew was wrong. People didn't forget, but she got her drama. When Reyna returned to school on Monday, a printed out picture of her at the party was taped to her locker. She just pulled out a sharpie from her backpack and turned her breasts into a smiley face. Unbothered. Her and Percy didn't talk again for months, not until after his accident. All he knew about her was that she and his cousin, Jason, dated until about the end of the school year.

While he was in the hospital, after an exceptionally emotional and draining talk with Jason, Reyna unexpectedly showed up. In her hand, she had a thin orange folder.

"It's a picture of Racy Reyna; my alter ego. Thought you'd wanna frame it."

Percy tried to laugh, but he didn't have it in him. So many tears had been shed in the previous hour, and she could tell. Immediately her expression switched from easy going to concerned. She pulled up a chair beside his bed, unfazed by the wires and tubes in and out of his body, which he appreciated.

"Maybe we'll go frame shopping later, did something happen with you and Jase? I saw him outside and he-" her voice wavered for a second. "I'd never seen him so upset. Cried in my arms for twenty minutes."

As if to answer her question, Percy's eyes began to water once more. He wasn't up for talking, and thankfully she got the message. Instead of pushing further, she engulfed him, or what was left of him, in a hug. He missed her so much he began to cry harder till he almost choked on the tears he couldn't wipe. Reyna wiped them away, similar to what Jason had done just forty minutes ago. Again, it just made it worse.

"It wa- wasn't a fight," he reassured her once he calmed down.

His voice was still slurred, so he needed to repeat for her to understand.

"What happened then?"

"A lot. He thinks it's his fault; I tried to tell him it wasn't. He didn't believe me."

"Give him time," she whispered.

"You're a- a lot nicer to be around when you aren't yelling," Percy said, finally a flicker of a smile appearing on his face.

"Yeah, well. It took a while, but I do forgive you, by the way. And want to be here for you. Heard you're switching to DSS."

Suddenly the regret hit him like a truck. He should've apologized the second she walked into the room, but he was too preoccupied with his near-death experience and talk with Jason.

"Should've said it before but I'm sorry, Rey. I missed you a lot."

She smiled, "Well, I missed you, too. And it's not too bad, turning down guys has been a riot. I terrify people."

"And rightfully so."

"So, what does DSS stand for anyway?"

"Delphi Strawberry Service."

Reyna cocked an eyebrow, "You're kidding!"

"Yeah, I am. I don't know or care what it stands for. Goode just doesn't want me back after the, ah, _gymnasium situation_ …"

"Iconic."

So they spent the rest of that day laughing and catching up just like old times. Percy would never forgive himself for what he did to Reyna, but at least they were able to move past it and become as close as they could after something like that. The fact that Annabeth knew only made him feel worse- not that he was judging him but that people not from Goode saw Reyna that way. She deserved better.

Opening up to Annabeth made Percy a lot happier. Again, it was as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He wanted- no, not wanted, _craved_ to talk to her again. His only worry was that, as she was high too, it was a one-time thing. The only other person he could talk to was Jason, but he cried every time they even mentioned the accident. Three months later, he still felt guilty, which made _Percy_ feel guilty.

There was Reyna, but the things he and Annabeth talked about wouldn't be conveyed well over text, and she was busy. Finally, he had Rachel. But they hadn't spoken in a month, not since she left for boarding school in July. No, it would have to be Annabeth if she was willing.

If only she weren't a complete stranger.


	9. hello percy,,, eight

Jason didn't know what happened the night Annabeth took Percy back to his room, but it had to have been life-changing for both of them because the regularly scheduled dirty looks apparently were a thing of the past. In fact, it was so weird to him he _had_ to ask Annabeth to spill. Jason didn't usually get involved in other's business, so even she was surprised when he asked. Instead of an answer, she said this.

"Did you know Percy is suicidal?"

He did, of course, know, but the question was, how did Annabeth? Percy barely opened up to anyone. Jason was just assuming they made out for a little bit or something like that, not that Percy dumped all his problems onto a girl he barely knew.

"Yeah, I've known for a while. When in the hospital, he asked a doctor about assisted suicide for kids. I heard outside the door."

"Shit, Jase," she pulled him in for a hug. "I'm so sorry."

Furiously blinking to stop his eyes from watering, he shook his head, "I came in after. It was my fault; I let him jump and wasn't paying attention when he started moving toward the rocks. I just felt so fucking _guilty_. And I told him. And it was bad."

Jason would never forget that day. Just as the doctor walked out, Jason rushed in, his eyes already welling with tears.

"You can't do it," he told his cousin, voice pleading. "You can't."

"Jason-"

"No, there's nothing you can say. I'll tell your mom and dad-"

"They can't do it anyway!" Percy snapped, closing his eyes.

He was hard to understand, but the sadness in his voice was evident. It was all Jason's fault. When Percy jumped, he was the one supposed to signal him if he leaned too far toward the rocks that ruined his life. Jason sat on the edge of the bed, the only place not covered in wires and tubes. His cousin was covered by a blanket, hiding the horrific scene below it. He was in a neck brace, which made him wince. At that point, nobody had told Jason that Percy would never walk again. But he'd find out in just minutes.

"I'm so sorry, Perce."

Percy took a deep breath, "Why? It's not your fault."

"I should've been paying attention. Are you gonna be okay?"  
For a while, Percy was quiet. After a couple of minutes, Jason decided to move closer to see if he'd fallen asleep, but instead, his cousin was doing something he'd never seen. He was crying. Jason was so stunned he almost missed it when the tears left Percy struggling to breathe. Why didn't he wipe them away? Nevertheless, Jason wiped them away for him, not bothering to demand an answer. His cousin most definitely wasn't going to be okay.

"What happened, bro?" he asked gently once Percy calmed down.

"The doctor," his already difficult to understand voice cracked. "The doctor said I was gonna be paralyzed. Forever. Don't know about my arms, but my legs… my legs for sure."

It was as if the wind had been knocked out of him. Percy Jackson, star of the swim team, state champ, the kid who could never sit still for the life of him, would never walk again. Never swim again. Never run away from Rachel screaming bloody murder, never jump another cliff. Never anything. And Jason would never forgive himself. He paralyzed Percy Jackson. He paralyzed his best friend. He paralyzed his brother.

Jason began to cry again, wrapping his arms around his cousin, repeatedly muttering, "I'm sorry" in between hiccups. Percy didn't say anything, he just cried, too.

"I don't know what I would do without you," he sobbed. "I don't care that you can't walk, even if you couldn't talk! I need you, Perce. I can't imagine life without you."

"I can't do this, Jason. If you really do love me, then you'll understand."

"No, you fucking idiot! I love you, so I know that you still have shit to look forward to! So what you can't fucking walk, so fucking what Percy! I'll always be right behind you pushing that stupid chair, feeding you, whatever you need me to fucking do! I don't know what you're going through, but I do know the pain you're in! If you do what you're planning, that pain will be passed down to the hundreds of people who love and care about you!"

By that point, the tears completely blurred his vision, but Jason stood tall, and his expression was stony. He was mad at Percy. Mad that his cousin even had the audacity to suggest killing himself would be the solution to his problems. Mad that he didn't care about Jason and the rest of his family, the burden they'd live with for the rest of their lives. He was selfish! He was- he was… he was suffering.

"I know you love me, J. I'm sorry. But it's my decision, not yours. It's not your fault."

"Yes, because if you go through with this, it won't only be my fault that this happened, and you fucking died as a result, but also because I didn't talk you out of it. I love you so fucking much. I get that you're not doing well, but shit, Perce. If you do it, I'm going with you. Because I'm living in a world without my brother."

Again, they were quiet for a while.

"Do you know what it's like to not be able to do anything for yourself?"

Of course, Jason couldn't answer. He did not know what it was like.

"The doctor, he was too afraid to use this thing called a catheter for piss and stuff, right? So right now I'm wearing a diaper. And this morning, I had to have my diaper changed by a grown woman who spoke to me like I was two years old. Do you know how fucking embarrassed I was? I can't live a life like this. It's not me."

"You know what else isn't you? Giving up this quick. I'd be fucking embarrassed, too, but at least I'm alive. At least I'm still here and have my family and friends supporting me every step of the way. People who support me and love me and sure as hell wouldn't even give a second thought if they had to change my fucking diaper at fifteen years old because they would _die_ for me. That's what you have, you _idiot_. I love you, man. I'd change your fucking diaper in a heartbeat, and so would all the people rallying behind you. And you act like you have no one."

Jason didn't even bother staying and waiting for Percy's response. He walked out of the room, putting his whole being into not crying. But once he saw Reyna waiting outside with her visitor's badge and orange folder, he cracked. It was all over from there.

As he was recounting the story to Annabeth, leaving out a few of the personal details, Jason realized he and Percy were never the same after that. Not just their relationship, but as their own selves. Personally, Jason grew from it. It was like letting open floodgates. They talked more, had deeper conversations, somehow managing to get even closer than before the accident. But they also saw each other in a different light. Percy suddenly seemed darker. He was so quick to jump to suicide as the answer that it was hard for Jason to believe it wasn't on his mind before that day. But why? He had a good family, good health at the time, lots of friends. Nothing made sense.

Jason was just rambling. He was confused. He'd never talked to anyone about it before, and here he was, same as Percy, letting it all out to Annabeth. What was going on?

"I think you should talk to him," she said softly. "Make him comfortable telling you the stuff he told me. I know you love him, Jase, he knows it, too. Just have a conversation."

She made it seem easy, which it wasn't. Jason knew from experience. He and Percy talked all the time, but whenever the topic got on discussing their feelings, the two of them completely shut down and attempted to change the direction of the conversation. Obviously, Percy was in desperate need of someone to open up to considering a couple of low-percentage pot brownies were enough to make him break down in front of Annabeth, a girl he didn't even know. He needed to be there for his cousin.

"I'll try," he promised. "Thanks for listening."

"No problem, Sparky," she teased, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

He sighed, muttering to himself as Annabeth walked away from their spot in the library, "Here we go."

That night after dinner, he caught up to Percy, who was in a heated discussion with Connor on whether or not One Direction was the greatest boyband ever to exist.

"I don't respect your opinion; One Direction is better."

Connor scoffed, his mouth full of food, "Tha's a lie! Fife Seconds 'a Summer, NSYNC? Who efen are you?"

Jason rolled his eyes, "Sorry to interrupt, but like, not really. Perce, you wanna head back?"

Percy must have noticed the tone in his voice because his smile faded slightly, but not enough for Connor to notice.

"Yeah," he turned to his roommate. "We will finish this later."

"It's already finished!" Connor called out behind them as they left the dining room.

It was a nice night. They were already in the first week of September, yet it felt like mid-July with the warm air and occasional breezes. Too bad summer was a bust, in more ways than one. He would've loved it if he wasn't dreading the conversation coming. Once they made it on the path back to the dorms and no one was around, Percy looked up at Jason.

"Annabeth told you, didn't she? What we were talking about a couple weeks ago?"

"A little. I asked her. She said you still…" he hesitated, steadying his voice. "She said you still wanna, like, die."

He was quiet for what seemed like forever to Jason but was, in fact, only a few mere minutes. They'd stopped right by the school garden, which was completely deserted except for the occasional buzz of some kind of bug. Percy's silence was deafening.

"I hate it," he said finally.

"Hate what, Perce?"

Percy took a shaky breath, gripping the wheels of his chair so tightly that even under the pale moonlight, Jason could see his knuckles go white.

"All of this shit. The waiting for the rest of my life for some miracle that I won't be stuck sitting forever, that I won't have to be taken care of like a little kid. It sucks, man."

Jason wanted to say he knew, but he didn't. How could he ever know what Percy was going through? It was beyond his worst nightmares. But he could just imagine a feeling similar, one he hoped he would never have to experience, but seemed like it could soon become a reality if he didn't get through to Percy.

"Remember that kid from my one gymnastics meet in eighth grade?" he asked.

Percy frowned, confused by the question, "That's not specific at all, Jase."

"The one who fell while he was messing around and got paralyzed just like you."

"Oh. Yeah."

Of course, Percy remembered, how could he not?

"Killed himself, remember?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I do."

Jason moved in front of Percy's chair, sat on the dirt path, and looked him right in the eye.

"Do you remember when we saw his mom at Westfield?"

Percy's eyes began to well with tears, "Yeah."

"And do you remember," he couldn't help the crack in his voice. "How she looked at you and fell onto the floor sobbing because of how much your hair looked like Ethan's? And this was before the chair. Do you wanna see your mom like that? Do you wanna see Aunt Sally on the floor in the mall crying over you just because she saw another kid with black hair?"

Percy shook his head, silently sobbing at that point. Jason was crying, too. He had to say it, though. He needed to show Percy how loved he is and what the consequences of his actions would be. Every time Jason thought about Mrs. Nakamura at the mall, he couldn't help but seeing his aunt or uncle, even himself, in that position. Crying over the black hair of a boy who was still alive, thinking of the black hair of a boy who wasn't. He got up onto his knees and engulfed Percy in a hug, promising himself he would never let any of his cousin's loved ones be put in that situation.

"I love you, man. All of us do."

Percy just cried into his shoulder until there were no more tears left.


End file.
